Can borderlines be good parents?

People with borderline personality disorder can be very effective and nurturing parents, but because the symptoms of BPD can be very intense, for many people this does take some work.


What kind of parents do borderlines have?

Unpredictable love - BPD parents may have difficulty providing children with a consistent feeling of being loved. Feeling threatened by a child's normal behavior - BPD parents may have difficulty allowing children to be angry with them without retaliating.

Should borderlines have kids?

The children of parents with BPD are at risk of poorer outcomes in terms of their own mental health, educational outcomes and wellbeing. The challenges of being a parent can also exacerbate the symptoms of those with BPD traits.


How does borderline personality disorder affect parental care?

Mothers with BPD are considered to be particularly at risk, with this group more likely to demonstrate misattuned speech and behaviour with their infants, including critical, intrusive and frightened or frightening comments and behaviours, and increased role confusion compared to those with depression and healthy ...

How to be a good mother with borderline personality disorder?

Tips for Parenting with Borderline Personality Disorder
  1. Educate yourself. ...
  2. Develop healthy coping skills. ...
  3. Practice mindfulness. ...
  4. Establish routines. ...
  5. Teach feelings. ...
  6. Get support. ...
  7. Use professional help.


What You Need to Know about Parents with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)



What are the traits of BPD mothers?

Mothers with BPD may oscillate between over-involved, intrusive behaviors and withdrawn, avoidant behaviors. These behaviors may also manifest as oscillations between hostile control and coldness.

What effect does a BPD mother have on a child?

Children of mothers with BPD are also at heightened risk for exhibiting attention difficulties, aggressive behavior, and low self-esteem, in addition to major depression, anxiety, and borderline personality disorder itself.

What happens to borderlines as they age?

The condition seems to be worse in young adulthood and may gradually get better with age. If you have borderline personality disorder, don't get discouraged. Many people with this disorder get better over time with treatment and can learn to live satisfying lives.


What is a waif borderline mother?

Low-Functioning BPD Mothers

The Waif: Waifs feel worthless and victimized. They can suffer from depression, anxiety, irrational fears, and feelings of vulnerability. Waifs feel helpless but reject attempts by family members to help them.

What childhood trauma causes BPD?

Verbal, emotional, physical, and sexual abuse, together with emotional and physical neglect, and chronic exposure to peer victimization were identified as potential factors that increase the risk for early BPD.

Can a person with BPD raise a child?

Many people with borderline personality disorder are highly functional parents. Some people raised by parents with BPD compensate by becoming exceptionally compassionate, mature, and competent.


What is the average length of a BPD relationship?

Results found in a 2014 study found the average length of a BPD relationship between those who either married or living together as partners was 7.3 years. However, there are cases where couples can stay together for 20+ years.

Can borderlines ever be happy?

Also, many people achieve remission — their symptoms become much less intense, so much so that they no longer meet the criteria for diagnosis. The stigma around BPD is pervasive, but many people get better. With treatment, it's possible to go on to lead a happy and healthy life.

What are the 4 types of borderline mother?

For example, in her book Understanding the Borderline Mother, Dr. Christine Lawson, describes four subtypes of mothers with BPD: the Waif (helpless), the Hermit (fearful/avoidant), the Queen (controlling) and the Witch (sadistic).


Do borderlines have psychopathic traits?

BPD features are highly represented in subjects with psychopathy as well as psychopathic traits are highly prevalent in patients with BPD.

Do borderlines have narcissistic traits?

Narcissism is not a symptom of BPD listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5). However, as many as 40% of people with BPD may also have narcissistic personality disorder,4 so people with BPD may also show signs of narcissism.

What are the borderline mother types out of the fog?

Lawson's book categorizes borderline mothers into four groups: Witches, Queens, Hermits, and Waifs. "Queens and Witches" are higher-functioning, acting-out "invisible" BPs, while "Hermits" and "Waifs" are lower-functioning, acting-in "conventional" types.


Do borderlines have body dysmorphia?

Results: The prevalence of BDD was 54.3% in the borderline sample. The BPD patients with BDD had significantly lower overall functioning and higher levels of BPD pathology, childhood traumatic experiences, suicide attempts, substance abuse and self-mutilation than those without BDD.

Can borderlines be delusional?

Delusions have a prevalence of 26% in patients with borderline personality disorder. Hallucinations and delusions are frequently intermittent or even persistent. Persistent hallucinations can be severe, causing disruption of life. Careful assessment of psychotic experiences in borderline patients is warranted.

What age does BPD peak?

Symptoms appeared to peak by age 15, decline through age 18, and remain steady between ages 18 and 19. Childhood temperament dimensions of emotionality, activity, low sociability, and shyness predict adolescent BPD symptom development.


Do borderlines end up alone?

Across the 20 years of the study, the rates of social isolation in the borderline participants ranged from 22 percent to 32 percent, with 26 percent remaining isolated at the end of the study period.

What is a Favourite person for borderline personality disorder?

What Is a BPD Favorite Person? For someone with BPD, the favorite person is deemed the most important person in their life. This person can be anyone, but it's often a romantic partner, family member, good friend, or another supportive person (like a coach, therapist, or teacher).

What's it like to have a parent with BPD?

Having one or more parents with borderline personality disorder can result in a chaotic, confusing, and even abusive childhood. Many children grow up having mixed feelings towards their parents, and may also struggle with relationships and self-esteem in their adult lives.


Does BPD come from mother or father?

Conclusions: Parental externalizing psychopathology and father's BPD traits contribute genetic risk for offspring BPD traits, but mothers' BPD traits and parents' poor parenting constitute environmental risks for the development of these offspring traits.

What is a petulant borderline wife?

Petulant BPD: This subtype fluctuates between outbursts of explosive anger and feelings of being unworthy or unloved. They have a strong need to manipulate or control others, and they become very possessive, which results in extreme dissatisfaction in their relationships.
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