Can people with BPD be abusive?

Those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or those with BPD who may not even know they have it, are more likely than the general population to be verbally, emotionally/psychologically, physically abusive.


What is BPD abuse like?

Often, the person with BPD will react towards loved ones as if they were the abusers from their past, and take out vengeance and anger towards them. When the person with BPD feels abandoned, they can become abusive or controlling as a way to defend against feelings of abandonment or feeling unworthy.

How do you deal with abusive BPD?

To help someone with BPD, first take care of yourself
  1. Avoid the temptation to isolate. ...
  2. You're allowed (and encouraged) to have a life! ...
  3. Join a support group for BPD family members. ...
  4. Don't neglect your physical health. ...
  5. Learn to manage stress. ...
  6. Listen actively and be sympathetic. ...
  7. Focus on the emotions, not the words.


How do borderlines destroy relationships?

BPD splitting destroys relationships by causing the person to distort how they see themselves and others. BPD relationships shift between highs and lows. BPD splitting destroy relationships in the way that the person defends against bad feelings within themselves so that they can feel good about themselves.

Can you be BPD and not abusive?

Something that is important to remember is that people with BPD generally do not mean to be abusive. They are reacting in response to emotional pain that they cannot tolerate.


Narcissism? Borderline Personality Disorder? This May Imitate Both...



Is BPD a result of narcissistic abuse?

The answer is 100% YES. I believe about 80% of those diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD) are actually are suffering from CPTSD from Narcissistic Abuse with abandonment issues.

Do borderlines have narcissistic traits?

Narcissism is not a symptom of BPD listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5). However, as many as 40% of people with BPD may also have narcissistic personality disorder,4 so people with BPD may also show signs of narcissism.

Why you shouldn't date someone with BPD?

Dating someone with borderline personality disorder can be challenging. Your partner may have major difficulties with strong emotions, drastic mood swings, chronic fear of abandonment, and impulsive behaviors that can strain your relationship with chaos and instability.


Does BPD cause toxic relationships?

Codependency in a relationship usually occurs when one of the partners has a Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). If your partner has either one of these personality disorders, you might find yourself stuck in a toxic codependent relationship.

Why do BPD people blame others?

They think it's the fault of a specific other person. They truly do not see their part in contributing to or primarily causing their own problems in life. This is an unconscious barrier, so you shouldn't try to “make them see” their part in the problem. That just increases their defensiveness and makes things worse.

What is borderline rage?

Borderline rage, or borderline anger, is more than just a standard emotional reaction. In the fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), anger in BPD is described as "inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger."


How do you soothe BPD rage?

Here are some tips on healthy ways to manage your anger with BPD.
  1. Count to 10. Hero Images / Getty Images. ...
  2. Notice Your Anger Earlier. Hero Images / Getty Images. ...
  3. Take a Break. Betsie Van Der Meer / Getty Images. ...
  4. Distract Yourself. ...
  5. Take Deep Breaths. ...
  6. Ground Yourself. ...
  7. Listen to Calming Music. ...
  8. Practice Letting Go.


Does BPD count as a disability?

The Social Security Administration placed borderline personality disorder as one of the mental health disorders on its disabilities list. However, you'll have to meet specific criteria for an official disability finding. For example, you must prove that you have the symptoms of the condition.

What are psychopathic traits in BPD?

Psychopathy is characterized by two primary sets of traits, the first marked by deficits in interpersonal-affective traits (referred to here as “Factor 1” or F1; grandiosity, shallow affect, callousness, deceitfulness) and the second marked by impulsive-antisocial traits (referred to here as “Factor 2” or F2; ...


Are people with BPD more easily traumatized?

People with Borderline Personality Disorder are 13 times more likely to report childhood trauma than people without any mental health problems, according to University of Manchester research.

Do borderlines regret the loss of a quality partner?

Do borderlines regret the loss of a quality partner? No, they often regret the decision to let that partner go. People who suffer from a borderline personality disorder (BPD) often have intense and unstable relationships. They may idealize their partners one minute and then devalue them the next.

Why are people with BPD so clingy?

At the same time, it's also common for someone with BPD to be needy, constantly seeking attention and validation to soothe insecurities. Behavior like this in any relationship can be hurtful and alienating, but it is done so out of fear and desperation, not maliciousness.


Are borderlines loyal?

We're loyal partners and friends

Though there's often an assumption that we have unstable relationships – and in fact this is listed as one of the main symptoms of BPD – we are extremely loyal. As mentioned above, we tend to put ourselves last. Relationships are truly important to us, and our loyalty is strong.

Do borderlines feel remorse?

Only remorse leads to a real apology and change. One of the hallmarks of people with Borderline Personality Disorder or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (BP/NP) is that they often do not feel truly sorry. Even though a BP/NP may say he or she is sorry, there is often something lacking.

How do you make someone with BPD feel loved?

In order to foster a strong bond, it's important to know how to love someone with borderline personality disorder in a way that nurtures both of you.
  1. Acknowledge the Realness of BPD. ...
  2. Make Room for Yourself. ...
  3. Stop Rescuing. ...
  4. Encourage High-Quality Treatment. ...
  5. Treatment at Bridges to Recovery.


How to break up with someone who has borderline personality disorder?

Gentle: Don't attack, threaten, or lay guilt trips. (Act) Interested: Listen to what your partner has to say, don't interrupt them, and be sensitive to what they are feeling. Validate: Be non-judgmental and validate their feelings and problems. Easy Manner: Try to be lighthearted and ease your partner along.

How long do BPD relationships last?

Results found in a 2014 study found the average length of a BPD relationship between those who either married or living together as partners was 7.3 years. However, there are cases where couples can stay together for 20+ years.

Do BPD have empathy?

People with BPD score low on cognitive empathy but high on emotional empathy. This suggests that they do not easily understand other peoples' perspectives, but their own emotions are very sensitive. This is important because it could align BPD with other neurodiverse conditions.


Why do narcissists love borderlines?

The Attraction

In the case of the borderline sufferer, when they first encounter the narcissist, they see everything they are not and cannot do. They're amazed by their confidence, as they recognise its absence in their own life. They find being involved with them validates their character, boosting their self-esteem.

Are borderlines insecure?

BPD is characterized by intense, unstable emotions and relationships as well as insecurity and self-doubt.