Do you introduce yourself at a wake?

Generally speaking, the public is invited to attend the wake, even if there's no personal relationship with the family. In this scenario, it's polite to introduce yourself and mention your relationship to the loved ones.


What is proper etiquette for a wake?

Dress nicely, but you don't need to be too formal. The standard protocol for a funeral visitation is to stop by, introduce yourself to the family (if needed) and pay your condolences, and then leave after a short period of time.

What do you say at a wake?

When attending a visitation, here are examples of what you can say to the family:
  • My condolences.
  • I'm really sorry you're going through this.
  • Your mom was a wonderful woman.
  • You loved him/her well.
  • I'm thinking of your family during this difficult time.


What do you do during a wake?

The primary purpose of a wake is to offer comfort to the family members. In some cases, there may be a formal receiving line for you to walk through to give your respects. Or, in a more informal atmosphere, this may involve simply sitting down with the family and sharing condolences and memories.

What is expected at a wake?

A wake, also known as a viewing, visitation or gathering, typically occurs before the funeral takes place. An urn or a casket is typically present, and the casket may be opened or closed. At this time, people pay their respects and offer condolences to loved ones of the departed.


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What not to say at a wake?

Don't tell friends or family members who are grieving that their loved one has gone to a better place. Never call the death a blessing or speculate that it was that person's time. Avoid saying anything that suggests that the loss of the loved one is a positive thing.

How long do you typically stay at a wake?

According to the The Funeral Source, it is appropriate for guests to stay at the wake for as little as 15 to 20 minutes. However, you should use your own discretion upon deciding when to leave. If you're close with the family, you may want to stay longer. Offer to help and socialize with the other guests at the wake.

Who speaks at a wake?

The speech is ideally given by someone who knew the person well enough to gather and share memories and highlights of his/her life. Sometimes the choice is obvious within the family. There is often one person who seems to be the unofficial family spokesperson.


Do you wear black to a wake?

When thinking about what to wear to a wake, women have to remember that this is a somber occasion, it is best to choose conservative colors and styles. You don't have to wear black, but it is acceptable if you decide to wear all black. Other colors include navy blue, gray, blush colors, and neutrals such as beige.

Can I wear jeans to a wake?

Avoid wearing casual clothes like t-shirts and jeans. Business casual is typically acceptable. Stay away from festive or fun attire. Sometimes families choose to encourage the celebration of their loved one's life at the wake.

How do you introduce yourself at a wake?

When introducing yourself to the family at a funeral or memorial service, be proactive. Those grieving will likely not approach you, so you should approach them. It's a good idea to keep your words brief. Say your name, explain your relationship to the person who died, and express your condolences.


Is it better to attend a wake or a funeral?

When You Should Attend Just the Wake or Just the Funeral. Someone wise once said that you should attend the wake if you would like to show support to the survivors. You should attend the funeral if you need to grieve yourself. If you find yourself in both camps, attend both the wake and the funeral.

Should I attend a wake?

As with a funeral service, if you are invited to a wake, viewing, or visitation you should feel free to go. If the event is limited to family only, you should respect the family's wishes and not attend.

How much money do you give at a wake?

How Much Should You Give? The traditional gift is the amount you would have spent on flowers for the service, generally between $50 and $100.


Is it rude to go to a wake but not the funeral?

Should I attend both the wake and the funeral? It is respectful to attend both, but not compulsory. If you don't feel comfortable attending the wake, or you have a prior commitment you can't avoid, it's polite to let the grieving family know in advance – a phone call or message is usually appropriate.

Is it customary to give money at a wake?

Money is not an appropriate gift, although exceptions may be made when the family is left in extreme financial difficulty. In that case, friends may wish to pool contributions to make a gift of assistance.

Do you wear jewelry to a wake?

Typically, a pair of earrings and a necklace are fine. But try not to wear jewellery that is too eye-catching. For this case, simple necklaces and stud earrings are preferred. But if the deceased had gifted you with a piece of jewellery, now would be a good time to wear it, no matter the design.


What color should not wear in wake?

Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.

How should a woman dress for a wake?

What Women Should Wear to a Wake
  1. A simple, solid-colored dress in muted colors and dark shoes.
  2. A dark skirt with a formal top and dark shoes.
  3. Dress pants with a dressy top or a sweater.
  4. Simple, classic jewelry such as a pearl necklace or stud earrings.


Do you bring anything to a wake?

Bring a gift as indicated by the family.

While not required, it is a nice gesture and will be greatly appreciated by the bereaved. It's also a nice gesture to ask the bereaved if you can bring food to the wake (or in the days before or after), to give them one less thing to worry about.


What to expect at a Catholic wake?

Wakes are typically held in the days before the funeral mass. During a wake, you'll likely see either an open or closed casket at the front of the funeral home, surrounded by personal touches, photographs, memorabilia, a crucifix and flowers.

What are the traditions of a wake?

Traditionally, windows of a wake house are left open to let the soul leave the room, mirrors are covered or turned around, clocks are stopped, and household pets are kept out for the duration of the wake. It is also customary for candles to be kept lit.

Can you wear jeans to a funeral?

Can you wear jeans to a funeral? Bottom line: jeans are not appropriate for a funeral. Unless the family requests them, you should avoid wearing denim to a funeral. However, if it's a casual, outdoor service, you can consider a dark (almost black denim) paired with a button-down shirt and blazer.


Can you wear white to a wake?

As a neutral color, white should not be considered inappropriate at most North American funerals. Though you should ask the family hosting the service when in doubt, plain, neutral colors are generally acceptable for memorials. Wearing white in conjunction with other dark tones is absolutely appropriate.

Do you wear black to a viewing?

While black is always a great go-to if you're unsure about what you're wearing, colors like gray and navy are also appropriate. Your most important goal is to avoid wearing anything that will distract attention away from the loved one who has passed away.