How do you handle flying monkeys?

Don't let it. Stop playing. The best way to get rid of a flying monkey is to run their comments through a filter of truth, educate them if you can, and always refuse to play their games.


How do you outsmart a flying monkey?

How to fend off narcissistic flying monkeys
  1. Hold on to your own reality. ...
  2. Invite some non-gaslighters into your life. ...
  3. Disengage from the narcissist and their enablers or flying monkeys. ...
  4. Consider therapy. ...
  5. Stop giving the benefit of the doubt and the second chances.


Should you respond to flying monkeys?

Grey rock — show no emotion and give the flying monkeys little to work with. Be willing to walk away if you feel yourself getting emotional in the face of the abuse. Surround yourself with the types of people who can help you. Document everything.


How do narcissists treat their flying monkeys?

When the narcissist wants to evoke some punishment on a target they dispatch their henchmen (aka flying monkeys) to do their bidding. Unfortunately, this can and often does include abusive behavior such as guilt-tripping, twisting the truth, gaslighting, assaults, threats, and violence.

When you ignore a flying monkey?

The flying monkey lives to serve the narcissist. So when you are ignoring them, and their job is to get as much intel from you as possible, they fail the narcissistic leader in their life. When you ignore the flying monkey, you are legit taking away their purpose. You are taking away their meaning for living.


How to handle flying monkeys



What type of person becomes a flying monkey?

FLYING MONKEY is a popular psychology term that refers to an enabler of a highly narcissistic person or someone with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). A flying monkey is an agent who acts on their behalf.

Why do people become flying monkeys?

Researchers identified several reasons why people become flying monkeys to narcissists. These involve: A need for self-preservation and protection – this often happens when a flying monkey is afraid or intimidated by the narcissist and would rather be on the ”good side” of the narc rather than go against them.

What object is used to control the flying monkeys?

In L. Frank Baum's 1900 book, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, the Wicked Witch of the West controlled the Flying Monkeys by using a golden helmet.


What is the best way to outsmart a narcissist?

How to Outsmart a Narcissist
  1. Separate yourself to cut off their narcissistic supply.
  2. Take time to heal.
  3. Take responsibility for your part in a conflict.
  4. React with empathy and respect.
  5. Act unresponsive around them.
  6. Disengage from their conversations.
  7. Set and enforce clear boundaries.


How do you silence a narcissist?

The following are 16 key phrases to disarm a narcissist:
  1. 1. “ ...
  2. “I Can't Control How You Feel About Me” ...
  3. “I Hear What You're Saying” ...
  4. “I'm Sorry You Feel That Way” ...
  5. “Everything Is Okay” ...
  6. “We Both Have a Right to Our Own Opinions” ...
  7. “I Can Accept How You Feel” ...
  8. “I Don't Like How You're Speaking to Me so I Will not Engage”


How do flying monkeys feel?

Flying monkeys often have strong narcissistic traits themselves, including a desire for attention, a lack of empathy, and a desire to bully and manipulate others.


How do you defend yourself against a monkey?

What to do if you are attacked? Do not run away or show fear – this will just tell the monkey that you are inferior and their aggression could intensify. Back away slowly, don't turn your back on the monkey but do avoid making eye contact. Show the monkey that you are not holding anything in your hands.

How narcissists recruit flying monkeys?

They recruit through contacting family members, friends, work colleagues. Sometimes even threaten the victim – 'I'm going to tell them what you're really like! ' – in other words, I'm going to tell them a version of you that is really not accurate at all but paints you in a bad light.

Who is the leader of the flying monkeys?

Nikko. Nikko is the leader of the Flying Monkeys and the secondary antagonist in the 1939 MGM film The Wizard of Oz. He is the movie version of the character called the Monkey King in L.


What are narcissist weaknesses?

A monumental weakness in the narcissist is the failure to look internally and flesh out what needs to be worked on. Then, of course, the next step is to spend time improving. The narcissist sabotages any possibility of looking deep within.

What turns a narcissist off?

When you don't depend on anyone to make money and you use your abundance to take care of yourself and not predators, you will always have the ability to control your own future. This is power, and pathologically envious narcissists are often turned off by it because it means they cannot easily control a victim.

How do I get power over a narcissist?

  1. Educate yourself about NPD. ...
  2. Build your self-esteem. ...
  3. Speak up for yourself. ...
  4. Set clear boundaries. ...
  5. Practice skills to keep calm. ...
  6. Find a support system. ...
  7. Insist on immediate action, not promises. ...
  8. Understand that a narcissistic person may need professional help.


What can chase away monkeys?

Monkeys are scared of snakes. Keep real looking plastic snakes at roof tops or boundary wall of your house. Loud heavy noise, bursting of crackers or their sound track will force the monkeys to leave any premises. An injured monkey should be helped when monkey group is not close by.

Do flying monkeys ever turn on the narcissist?

If the flying monkey is another narcissist, they most often will try to turn the tables on the first narcissist in order to depose them and take their place. This may also occur with an antisocial personality if they can benefit from doing so. Otherwise, they may just break ties with the narcissist and move on.

How can you tell if someone is a flying monkey?

How to Spot Flying Monkeys
  1. Gossiping: Flying monkeys benefit narcissists by spreading rumors and lies about others. ...
  2. Surveillance: Another major help flying monkeys provide for abusers is surveillance. ...
  3. Gaslighting and victim-blaming: Flying monkeys are fiercely loyal to narcissists.


What is Grayrocking?

Also known as graywalling or gray rocking, this strategy involves being as disengaged and unresponsive as possible. The goal is to keep your responses limited in order to make the person you are communicating with lose interest in you.

What is future faking in a relationship?

"Future faking is when someone uses a detailed vision of the future to facilitate the bonding and connection in a romantic relationship," Greg Kushnick, PsyD, a psychologist based in New York City, told Health. It's generally something narcissists do, added Dr.

How do narcissists triangulate?

Triangulation happens when one or both of the people involved in the conflict try to pull a third person into the dynamic, often with the goal of: deflecting some of the tension. creating another conflict to take the spotlight off the original issue. reinforcing their sense of rightness or superiority.


Why do narcissists have flying monkeys?

Generally speaking, narcissists use flying monkeys to manipulate others into reconciling with them, to invalidate, devalue, and degrade others, to support their twisted perception of reality, and to push past any boundaries that others may have set to protect themselves.

How do narcissists try to control you?

They use shock, awe, and guilt.

Narcissists continue to gain control of the people in their lives by eliciting difficult emotions. “After going through a period of 'grooming' someone for a close relationship, the narcissist moves on to use shock, awe, and guilt to maintain control,” Talley explains.