How do you help someone in a BPD episode?

But there are lots of positive things you can do to support them:
  1. Be patient.
  2. Don't judge.
  3. Be calm and consistent.
  4. Remind them of their positive traits.
  5. Set clear boundaries.
  6. Plan ahead.
  7. Learn their triggers.
  8. Provide distractions.


How do you relax someone with borderline personality disorder?

Listening to your loved one and acknowledging their feelings is one of the best ways to help someone with BPD calm down. When you appreciate how a borderline person hears you and adjust how you communicate with them, you can help diffuse the attacks and rages and build a stronger, closer relationship.

What are some coping mechanisms for BPD?

You could:
  • Wrap up in a blanket and watch your favourite TV show.
  • Write all your negative feelings on a piece of paper and tear it up.
  • Listen to music that you find uplifting or soothing.
  • Write a comforting letter to the part of yourself that is feeling sad or alone.
  • Let yourself cry or sleep.
  • Cuddle a pet or a soft toy.


What do you say to someone with BPD in crisis?

Things you can say or do to help a person in crisis:
  • Acknowledge their feelings.
  • Witness their process.
  • Affirm their right to speak.
  • Validate their emotional experience.
  • Listen without judgement and be sensitive.
  • Allow them to process what is going on.
  • Let them cry.


What do you say to someone who is in a borderline episode?

Tell them that you really want to understand, and ask if they can say more about what they are feeling and why. Give the person hope for recovery by reassuring them that people with BPD can and do get better. Accept that the person is struggling and that life goals might need to be broken down into smaller steps.


Supporting Loved One with BPD Quickstart Guide



How do you calm a BPD rage?

Here are some tips on healthy ways to manage your anger with BPD.
  1. Count to 10. Hero Images / Getty Images. ...
  2. Notice Your Anger Earlier. Hero Images / Getty Images. ...
  3. Take a Break. Betsie Van Der Meer / Getty Images. ...
  4. Distract Yourself. ...
  5. Take Deep Breaths. ...
  6. Ground Yourself. ...
  7. Listen to Calming Music. ...
  8. Practice Letting Go.


How do you calm an angry BPD?

Listen actively and be sympathetic and focus on emotions rather than the words. Ensure that you demonstrate that the person with BPD feels heard. When someone is upset or angry, it's easy and understandable to reciprocate, but it is not helpful.

How do you make someone with BPD feel loved?

In order to foster a strong bond, it's important to know how to love someone with borderline personality disorder in a way that nurtures both of you.
  1. Acknowledge the Realness of BPD. ...
  2. Make Room for Yourself. ...
  3. Stop Rescuing. ...
  4. Encourage High-Quality Treatment. ...
  5. Treatment at Bridges to Recovery.


What not to say to someone with borderline personality disorder?

  • “You're so emotionally unstable.” ...
  • “You don't need to get so angry all the time.” ...
  • “You're so stupid, you spend all of your money without thinking about the consequences.” ...
  • “What caused that disorder?” ...
  • “I can't cope with you and your mood swings!”


How do you comfort someone mentally unstable?

What emotional support can I offer?
  1. Listen. Simply giving someone space to talk, and listening to how they're feeling, can be really helpful in itself. ...
  2. Offer reassurance. Seeking help can feel lonely, and sometimes scary. ...
  3. Stay calm. ...
  4. Be patient. ...
  5. Try not to make assumptions. ...
  6. Keep social contact.


How long do BPD episodes last?

A person with BPD may experience intense episodes of anger, depression, and anxiety that may last from only a few hours to days.”


What is the best mood stabilizer for BPD?

Common anticonvulsants and mood stabilizers for BPD include:
  • Depakote (valproate)
  • Lamictal (lamotrigine)
  • Lithobid (lithium)
  • Tegretol or Carbatrol (carbamazepine)


What triggers BPD episodes?

Separations, disagreements, and rejections—real or perceived—are the most common triggers for symptoms. A person with BPD is highly sensitive to abandonment and being alone, which brings about intense feelings of anger, fear, suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and very impulsive decisions.

How long does BPD rage last?

Intense and sometimes inappropriate rage is a characteristic of borderline personality disorder (BPD). A person with this condition has difficulty regulating their emotions or returning to their baseline. Extremes of rage and other intense emotions may last longer than might be expected, from a few hours to a few days.


What is BPD splitting?

Splitting is a psychological mechanism which allows the person to tolerate difficult and overwhelming emotions by seeing someone as either good or bad, idealised or devalued. This makes it easier to manage the emotions that they are feeling, which on the surface seem to be contradictory.

How do you keep a borderline happy?

The following 9 strategies can help you support a person with BPD:
  1. Learn about BPD. ...
  2. Show confidence and respect. ...
  3. Be trustworthy. ...
  4. Manage conflict with attachment. ...
  5. Encourage Professional Help. ...
  6. Identify strengths. ...
  7. Have fun together. ...
  8. Take suicide seriously.


Can a borderline be loved?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) isn't a personal choice. It's a mental health condition, and it can be managed. Can a person with borderline personality disorder feel love? Absolutely!


What do you say to a quiet BPD person?

Helping Someone Cope With Quiet BPD
  • Listen and be sympathetic. ...
  • Ask questions. ...
  • Validate their feelings. ...
  • Help them practice self-soothing strategies. ...
  • Set healthy boundaries. ...
  • Consider making a family therapy appointment. ...
  • Encourage them to use mindfulness techniques. ...
  • Celebrate smaller wins.


How to date a girl with borderline personality disorder?

12 Tips When Dating Someone With BPD
  1. Know Your Partner May Have Comorbidities. ...
  2. Learn About BPD. ...
  3. Consider Your Partner's Perception of the Relationship. ...
  4. Make Sure You Understand BPD Cycles. ...
  5. Preserve Your Well-being. ...
  6. Set Limits & Boundaries. ...
  7. Communicate Effectively. ...
  8. Learn to Detach With Love.


Do borderlines deserve love?

They are often criticized, marginalized and stigmatized, but the truth is that they deserve love and understanding like anyone else. BPD, or borderline personality disorder, is a psychological diagnosis that indicates a person has difficulty regulating their emotions.


How do you empathize someone with BPD?

Empathy goes deeper than sympathy in that it allows you to feel for what another person is going through.
...
Here are six tips on how to practice empathy so that you can better support your loved one with Borderline Personality Disorder:
  1. Take Your Time. ...
  2. Validate. ...
  3. Support. ...
  4. Listen. ...
  5. Body Language. ...
  6. Respect.


How do you respond to BPD silent treatment?

How to respond
  1. Name the situation. Acknowledge that someone is using the silent treatment. ...
  2. Use 'I' statements. ...
  3. Acknowledge the other person's feelings. ...
  4. Apologize for words or actions. ...
  5. Cool off and arrange a time to resolve the issue. ...
  6. Avoid unhelpful responses.


Why do borderlines hurt the ones they love?

Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. They may not realise that their feelings belong within them, so they think that their partner is responsible for hurting them and causing them to feel this way.


How do you calm a paranoid borderline?

Some of the therapies that have helped people with BPD change their patterns of thinking and reacting include dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), and psychodynamic therapy, all of which combine practical strategies for self-improvement with the search for greater self-understanding.

What is a BPD Favourite person?

A favorite person is the center of attention of an individual living with BPD. This means they consider this person as a trusted friend, confidant, and counselor all wrapped in one. Dr. Roberts notes that the person with BPD demonstrates an “anxious-preoccupied attachment style.”
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