How do you respond to BPD rage?

How to Help
  1. Be patient.
  2. Be realistic.
  3. Try to separate facts from feelings.
  4. Validate feelings first.
  5. Listen actively and be sympathetic.
  6. Seek to distract when emotions rise.
  7. Do not allow yourself to be the product of the intense anger; attempt to diffuse it but sometimes you may have to walk away.


How do I deal with my partner's BPD rage?

Listen actively and be sympathetic and focus on emotions rather than the words. Ensure that you demonstrate that the person with BPD feels heard. When someone is upset or angry, it's easy and understandable to reciprocate, but it is not helpful.

What are some coping mechanisms for BPD?

You could:
  • Wrap up in a blanket and watch your favourite TV show.
  • Write all your negative feelings on a piece of paper and tear it up.
  • Listen to music that you find uplifting or soothing.
  • Write a comforting letter to the part of yourself that is feeling sad or alone.
  • Let yourself cry or sleep.
  • Cuddle a pet or a soft toy.


How do you respond to a BPD provocation?

In summary, be relentlessly respectful of BPD's suffering, abilities, and values. Be humble without disrespecting yourself or your own well being. Be honest. Communicate an expectation that someone with BPD will be able to behave in a reasonable and cooperative manner, and play to his or her strengths.

How do I calm down my BPD episode?

If you suffer from borderline personality disorder, here are some ways to help cope with the symptoms that can lead to or trigger an episode:
  1. Take a warm shower or bath.
  2. Play music that relaxes you.
  3. Engage in a physical activity.
  4. Do brain teasers or problem-solving activities.
  5. Talk to a sympathetic loved one.


Steps for Self or Loved Ones to Lessen BPD Episodes (aggression, anger, outbursts)



How long does BPD rage last?

Intense and sometimes inappropriate rage is a characteristic of borderline personality disorder (BPD). A person with this condition has difficulty regulating their emotions or returning to their baseline. Extremes of rage and other intense emotions may last longer than might be expected, from a few hours to a few days.

Are people with BPD violent?

Findings showed that 73% of BPD subjects engaged in violence during the one-year study period, and frequently exhibited co-morbid antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) and psychopathic characteristics. Reported violence was mostly characterized by disputes with acquaintances or significant others.

How do you respond to BPD silent treatment?

How to respond
  1. Name the situation. Acknowledge that someone is using the silent treatment. ...
  2. Use 'I' statements. ...
  3. Acknowledge the other person's feelings. ...
  4. Apologize for words or actions. ...
  5. Cool off and arrange a time to resolve the issue. ...
  6. Avoid unhelpful responses.


How do borderlines deal with intense emotions?

Managing Emotions Despite BPD
  1. Incorporating stress-reduction techniques into your life.
  2. Exercising regularly.
  3. Using grounding techniques in moments of intense distress.
  4. Practicing mindfulness meditation.
  5. Expressing your emotions through writing.
  6. Educating yourself about BPD.


Why do borderlines hurt the ones they love?

Often, the borderline person is unaware of how they feel when their feelings surface, so they displace their feelings onto others as causing them. They may not realise that their feelings belong within them, so they think that their partner is responsible for hurting them and causing them to feel this way.

How do you cheer up someone with BPD?

But there are lots of positive things you can do to support them:
  1. Be patient.
  2. Don't judge.
  3. Be calm and consistent.
  4. Remind them of their positive traits.
  5. Set clear boundaries.
  6. Plan ahead.
  7. Learn their triggers.
  8. Provide distractions.


How do I keep my BPD under control?

People with BPD can benefit by being physically active, practicing self-care, keeping busy, and taking breaks. Dialectical behavioral therapy and group/individual therapy can help someone deal with BPD. Grounding exercises and having an emergency safety plan are recommendations to overcome BPD.

How do you stop impulses BPD?

Therapeutic approaches such as cognitive behavioral therapy and a type of CBT known as dialectical behavior can be the most effective approaches. DBT focuses on the patient building skills that reduce their impulsive behavior and increase their ability to think and reflect before acting on their impulses.

What happens when a BPD gets angry?

In BPD, anger often leads to destructive behavior such as aggression. Typically, aggression in BPD is classified as reactive in nature with real or assumed social rejection, threat, provocation, or frustration being assumed to be the most important triggers [3, 9,10,11].


What not to say to someone with BPD?

  • “You're so emotionally unstable.” ...
  • “You don't need to get so angry all the time.” ...
  • “You're so stupid, you spend all of your money without thinking about the consequences.” ...
  • “What caused that disorder?” ...
  • “I can't cope with you and your mood swings!”


Do borderlines hold grudges?

What others perceive as a simple mistake to be brushed off, people with BPD might perceive as a serious wrongdoing. You might hold onto a grudge for days, or until the person has apologized sufficiently.

Can people with BPD control their actions?

Those with borderline personality disorder tend to exhibit control over their environment by creating and exacerbating disruptive circumstances; thereby influencing others to behave in a certain manner to decrease the affected individual's reactions.


Why do borderlines push you away?

If someone has a borderline personality, they will always push people away, in fear of getting hurt. This is extremely difficult and painful for the people around them, as the sufferer can seem cold and angry, attention seeking, or not wanting help.

Can borderlines turn off emotions?

Many people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) will report that they spend a lot of time and energy suppressing emotions. If you have ever had an intense thought or feeling that you couldn't handle in the moment and tried to push away, you have experienced emotional suppression.

How do you stop a quiet episode in BPD?

How is quiet BPD treated?
  1. Schema therapy. Schema therapy has been shown to be effective for treating BPD. ...
  2. Mentalization based therapy (MBT) MBT is another treatment option that's shown promising results in research . ...
  3. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) ...
  4. Medications. ...
  5. Living with BPD.


Do people with quiet BPD isolate themselves?

As with 'classic BPD', you have a deep fear of abandonment, but instead of fighting for attachment in the form of clinginess, in quiet BPD you believe you deserve to be abandoned. The self-loathing can drive you to isolate yourself for days and weeks.

Why do people with BPD resist treatment?

Family issues as a source of resistance

Another important source of resistance in treating patients with BPD is their notion that change may entail betraying their family in particular ways as well as giving up habits they may feel work well for them in avoiding feelings.

Are people with BPD more easily traumatized?

People with Borderline Personality Disorder are 13 times more likely to report childhood trauma than people without any mental health problems, according to University of Manchester research.


What is a Favourite person in BPD?

A favorite person is the center of attention of an individual living with BPD. This means they consider this person as a trusted friend, confidant, and counselor all wrapped in one. Dr. Roberts notes that the person with BPD demonstrates an “anxious-preoccupied attachment style.”

Do people with BPD say hurtful things?

Once upset, borderline people are often unable to think straight or calm themselves in a healthy way. They may say hurtful things or act out in dangerous or inappropriate ways. This emotional volatility can cause turmoil in their relationships and stress for family members, partners, and friends.