Is it rude to go to a wake but not the funeral?

If you didn't know the deceased personally
To support them, you can go to the wake but not the funeral. Attending the wake helps express your condolences. And is appropriate for this kind of relationship. Your presence will be appreciated.


Is it rude to only attend a wake?

As with a funeral service, if you are invited to a wake, viewing, or visitation you should feel free to go. If the event is limited to family only, you should respect the family's wishes and not attend.

Is it rude to go to viewing not funeral?

It's typically considered more important to attend the funeral service. Perhaps you'd feel more comfortable only attending the funeral; however, you might like the chance to speak to the family in a more relaxed setting at the visitation. As long as you're kind and respectful, the choice is yours.


Is it better to go to a wake or funeral?

In most situations, going to one or the other is acceptable - especially if you did not know the deceased but are going to provide support to a friend or family member. If you were close to the deceased and/or close to the family, then every effort should be made to attend the wake and the funeral services.

Is a wake more casual than a funeral?

Wakes are generally more casual and interactive than funeral services, which are more structured around certain rituals. Many families will have both a wake and a funeral, with the wake taking place the day before the funeral service or afterward at the families' home.


Wake vs Funeral vs Memorial vs Viewing: What's the Difference?



What is appropriate to wear to a wake?

A wake is all about paying respects to the dead. It's an unspoken rule that guests must wear black when attending a solemn event such as this one. However, this isn't necessarily the case. Some families may do away with the traditional mourning attires and instead wear dark or muted-colour clothing.

Is it OK to wear jeans to a wake?

Jeans are acceptable in all kinds of places where they never were before: religious services, airline flights, even our jobs. But when it comes to post-death rituals such as funerals and wakes, dressier outfits are still expected. In general, jeans should be avoided unless you have nothing else to wear.

How long should you stay at a wake?

According to the The Funeral Source, it is appropriate for guests to stay at the wake for as little as 15 to 20 minutes. However, you should use your own discretion upon deciding when to leave. If you're close with the family, you may want to stay longer. Offer to help and socialize with the other guests at the wake.


Do friends go to the wake or funeral?

Close family and friends of the person who died will likely attend the visitation and funeral service. Others may attend both or may need to or prefer to attend one or the other but not both. Visitation may take place the day before the funeral, the evening before or even just hours before the funeral service.

Is it selfish not to go to a funeral?

In reality, they're a way for the family to find comfort and peace. While it's usually a good idea to attend the funeral if you're close to the deceased or the family, this isn't always the case. You shouldn't feel wrong about not wanting to attend the funeral, especially if you have a legitimate conflict.

What does it mean to attend a wake?

What is a Wake? A wake, also known as a visitation, typically occurs before the funeral takes place. The body is present at this time for people to pay their respects and offer condolences to loved ones of the deceased.


Do you give money at a wake?

It's common for people to give money at birthdays, weddings, but at funerals giving money isn't always a respectful gift. However, the protocols can sometimes be altered and people may still offer money if that's how they feel, or the grieving family needs the help.

What to expect at a wake?

A wake, also known as a viewing, visitation or gathering, typically occurs before the funeral takes place. An urn or a casket is typically present, and the casket may be opened or closed. At this time, people pay their respects and offer condolences to loved ones of the departed.

What should you not do at a wake?

But during the wake of their beloved, superstitions say that one must refrain from sweeping the floor. Neither should you try and take a shower at the place where the deceased is. Doing so may send its spirit away from the place, preventing it from “safely passing” to life after death.


What should you not say at a wake?

Don't tell friends or family members who are grieving that their loved one has gone to a better place. Never call the death a blessing or speculate that it was that person's time. Avoid saying anything that suggests that the loss of the loved one is a positive thing.

Is it disrespectful not to go to a friend's funeral?

The purpose of a funeral is to mourn the deceased and show support for their family. If you don't feel comfortable doing this then you are not obliged to attend a funeral. But, out of respect, you may want to let the bereaved family know you won't be attending.

Do you invite people to a wake?

As a general rule, everyone is welcome at a funeral and you don't need to wait for an invitation. This includes those who didn't know the deceased but would like to offer their support to the family or another guest.


Can you wear jeans to a funeral?

Can you wear jeans to a funeral? Bottom line: jeans are not appropriate for a funeral. Unless the family requests them, you should avoid wearing denim to a funeral. However, if it's a casual, outdoor service, you can consider a dark (almost black denim) paired with a button-down shirt and blazer.

Do you wear black to a viewing?

While black is always a great go-to if you're unsure about what you're wearing, colors like gray and navy are also appropriate. Your most important goal is to avoid wearing anything that will distract attention away from the loved one who has passed away.

What color should not wear in wake?

Wearing dark grey or deep blue is just as appropriate as black, while brown and lighter greys are suitable for the vast majority of funeral services. However, unless specifically requested by the deceased or their family, you should avoid any bright colors such as yellows, oranges, pinks, and reds.


Do you wear jewelry to a wake?

Typically, a pair of earrings and a necklace are fine. But try not to wear jewellery that is too eye-catching. For this case, simple necklaces and stud earrings are preferred. But if the deceased had gifted you with a piece of jewellery, now would be a good time to wear it, no matter the design.

Why do they call it wake?

The name “wake” originated because unknown diseases had plagued the countryside causing some to appear dead. As the family began to mourn, they would awaken. For this reason, the body is waked in the deceased's home for at least one night.

Can you dress casual to a wake?

And you don't want the people attending the wake to be more formally dressed than you. However, do not let your concern over clothes keep you from attending a wake. While this advice encourages formal dress, it is better to dress casually and attend a wake than not go at all.


Are wakes casual?

Even though a wake is a more casual gathering than a funeral service, you still want to pay your respects to the family. Women should avoid wearing: Bright colors and loud prints. Mini-skirts, blouses or dresses with low cleavage, and spandex.

How should a woman dress for a wake?

For funerals and wakes, women should wear a long dress or skirt that covers their knees and thighs. Longer than the above example would be appropriate. The dress's color should match or coordinate with the color of your blouse or shirt. For formal funerals and wakes, avoid white dresses.