What is at the core of codependency?

The core symptoms of co-dependence include experiencing difficulties with: Self-esteem and self-love. Setting functional boundaries with other people and protecting oneself. Owning one's own reality and identifying who one is.


What is the root of codependency?

Codependency is usually rooted in childhood. Often, a child grows up in a home where their emotions are ignored or punished. This emotional neglect can give the child low self-esteem and shame. They may believe their needs are not worth attending to.

What are the five core symptoms of codependency?

Support for codependency

feelings of anxiety or depression. feelings of emptiness. a general sense of powerlessness or helplessness. diminished self-esteem.


What are the components of codependency?

Based on her research, Spann concluded that codependency boils down to three elements: an extreme focus outside of the self; a lack of openly expressing one's feelings; and an attempt to derive purpose and meaning through relationships with others, rather than through one's own self.

What are the two sides of codependency?

Codependent: The codependent has no personal identity, interests, or values outside of their codependent relationship. Dependent: Both people can express their emotions and needs and find ways to make the relationship beneficial for both of them.


What is Toxic Shame? - The Core of Codependency and Addiction



How do you break codependency?

Some healthy steps to healing your relationship from codependency include:
  1. Start being honest with yourself and your partner. ...
  2. Stop negative thinking. ...
  3. Don't take things personally. ...
  4. Take breaks. ...
  5. Consider counseling. ...
  6. Rely on peer support. ...
  7. Establish boundaries.


What is classic codependent behavior?

A tendency to confuse love and pity, with the tendency to “love” people they can pity and rescue. A tendency to do more than their share, all of the time. A tendency to become hurt when people don't recognize their efforts. An unhealthy dependence on relationships.

What trauma leads to codependency?

Childhood trauma is often a root cause of codependency. They don't always result, but for many people codependent relationships are a response to unaddressed past traumas. One reason may be that childhood trauma is usually family-centered: abuse, neglect, domestic violence, or even just divorce and fighting.


What creates a codependent person?

Codependence is thought to develop when a child grows up in a dysfunctional family environment where fear, anger, and shame go unacknowledged. The dynamic leads family members to withhold from expressing (repressing) their emotions and ignore their own needs.

What are 5 to 10 characteristics of a codependent person?

Signs of codependency include:
  • Difficulty making decisions in a relationship.
  • Difficulty identifying your feelings.
  • Difficulty communicating in a relationship.
  • Valuing the approval of others more than valuing yourself.
  • Lacking trust in yourself and having poor self-esteem.


What are the 6 pillars of codependency?

Below are six of the defining characteristics of codependency: poor boundaries, a weak sense of self, unhealthy emotional dependency and caretaking, controlling behaviors, difficulty with intimacy, and being uncomfortable with feelings.


What are codependents afraid of?

Codependent fears

As a result, codependents tend to fear rejection, criticism, not being good enough, failure, conflict, vulnerability, and being out of control. So, situations and people that trigger these fears can spike our anxiety.

Are codependents Empaths?

Empaths can have codependent tendencies but not all codependents are empaths. The difference is that empaths absorb the stress, emotions, and physical symptoms of others, something not all codependents do.

What are the three steps to heal from codependency?

Recovering from codependency involves: 1) Establishing boundaries, 2) Taking responsibility for your health and happiness, 3) Getting to know yourself, and 4) Learning to love yourself.


What mental illness causes codependency?

Mental health experts borrowed criteria of codependent behavior from dependent personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and histrionic personality disorder. Even without a clear diagnosis, giving up on someone with mental illness should be avoided.

Why do codependents obsess?

Codependent individuals obsess about our relationships because they distract us from being alone with ourselves and give us a place where we can replicate the meaning-making activities of our childhood, including care-taking, self-sacrifice, and martyrdom.

Is a codependent a narcissist?

Codependency is when two people are locked in a life where they feed off on another, causing mental anguish. Narcissism is when one of the pair is self-centered, arrogant, and lacks empathy for their partner.


Can a codependent person love?

A codependent relationship can look like love, but it isn't. Love is predicated on choice, the choice to support and care for another. If you are dependent on another person for your emotional security and welfare, then the relationship is no longer based on love. Instead, it is based on need.

What is the opposite of codependent?

Codependency, the habit of gaining your self worth from pleasing others, is something most people know of nowadays. But it's lesser known opposite, called counterdependency, can be just as much of a problem.

How did you heal from codependency?

Healing codependency involves: 1) Untangling yourself from other people, 2) Owning your part, 3) Getting to know yourself, and 4) Loving yourself.


What are good jobs for codependents?

She states that many experts have shown that codependents tend to choose careers in the helping professions such as nursing, social work, and other related disciplines.

What attachment style do codependents have?

Anxious attachment is what is most often referred to as codependent. Those with anxious attachment often feel as though they would like to be close to others or one person in particular but they worry that another person may not want to be close to them. They struggle with feeling inferior, never good enough.

What are the codependent crazies?

All those traits in a relationship create great pain and bizarrely often make the wounded party anxiously cling, minimizing or denying their pain, as they try even harder to make the relationship work. Sounds crazy doesn't it – and that's exactly what it's called – the codependent crazies!


What is high functioning codependency?

High functioning codependency is a behavior characterized by blurred boundaries and an imbalance in relationships. In highly functioning codependent relationships, one person takes responsibility for fulfilling another person's needs, trying to control all aspects of their relationship.

Do codependents feel empathy?

A codependent is someone whose feelings, thoughts, and actions revolve around another person. [I] Codependents needn't be empathetic and an empath needn't be codependent. Some people justify or glorify their codependency on the fact that they're empathetic; however, codependency is something very specific.