Why do borderlines love narcissists?

The Attraction
In the case of the borderline sufferer, when they first encounter the narcissist, they see everything they are not and cannot do. They're amazed by their confidence, as they recognise its absence in their own life. They find being involved with them validates their character, boosting their self-esteem.


Are BPD attracted to narcissists?

Ask any mental health professional knowledgeable about BPD and they'll tell you that these two types of personality disorders tend to be attracted to each other. The borderline and narcissist relationship is prevalent and most likely, incredibly toxic and abusive.

What happens when a borderline is with a narcissist?

NPD and BPD in Relationships

In addition to the chaotic emotional life and fears of abandonment associated with BPD, a person with co-occurring NPD may also take advantage of or manipulate others while having little empathy for others' concerns. This combination can be incredibly destructive in relationships.


Who are borderlines attracted to?

Borderline/dependent: A person with borderline personality disorder (BPD) is well-matched with a person who has a dependent personality disorder (DPD). The BPD has an intense fear of abandonment which is a good match for the DPD who will not leave even a dysfunctional relationship.

Why do people with BPD date people with NPD?

When the person with NPD meets someone with BPD, they can tend to use them to fulfil their need for validation, often at the expense of the BPD sufferer's boundaries and feelings. This insatiable need for attention coupled with the heightened emotions of BPD to make a volatile mix.


Why Borderlines and Narcissists Attract. BPD and NPD have romantic relationships and fall in love.



How long does an NPD BPD relationship last?

Results found in a 2014 study found the average length of a BPD relationship between those who either married or living together as partners was 7.3 years. However, there are cases where couples can stay together for 20+ years.

Can a narcissist date a borderline?

Individuals with borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder may marry or enter into intimate relationships with each other, more than statistically likely, it seems.

Do borderlines choose their favorite person?

MD. People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) often rotate between idolizing and devaluing others. In the case of the “favorite person,” the individual with BPD prefers one person and wants to spend all their time with them.


Do borderlines ever forgive?

These results suggest that patients with BPD report becoming more accepting and forgiving over time. Additionally, recovery status is significantly associated with increasing time in these states.

Are borderlines jealous?

In close relationships, a person with BPD may appear jealous, possessive, or hyper-reactive. These individuals often fear being left alone and have deep feelings of worthlessness. In many cases, this disorder is the direct result of childhood trauma, abuse, violence, or neglect.

Does childhood trauma cause narcissism?

Narcissism and its Origins

Narcissism tends to emerge as a psychological defence in response to excessive levels of parental criticism, abuse or neglect in early life. Narcissistic personalities tend to be formed by emotional injury as a result of overwhelming shame, loss or deprivation during childhood.


Do borderlines fall in love?

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) isn't a personal choice. It's a mental health condition, and it can be managed. Can a person with borderline personality disorder feel love? Absolutely!

Are borderlines psychopaths?

BPD features are highly represented in subjects with psychopathy as well as psychopathic traits are highly prevalent in patients with BPD.

What personality type is attracted to a narcissist?

People with type A personalities attract narcissists, but a relationship between the two is a recipe for disaster.


Can narcissism be misdiagnosed as BPD?

Based on overlapping symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) are often mistaken for one another. The two personality disorders even have a rate of co-occurrence of about 25 percent, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI).

What does BPD remission look like?

Remission is the stage where you no longer meet the specified criteria for a BPD diagnosis. Recovery is less well-defined, but suggests that you are able to function in all aspects of your life for an extended period of time. This includes holding down a job and maintaining meaningful relationships.

How do borderlines heal after a breakup?

Healing from Heartbreak with BPD
  1. Remember this emotion is temporary. ...
  2. Ride the emotions like a wave. ...
  3. Don't expect others to feel as strongly as you feel. ...
  4. Take a step back before reacting. ...
  5. Be kind to yourself.


Why do borderlines push you away?

If someone has a borderline personality, they will always push people away, in fear of getting hurt. This is extremely difficult and painful for the people around them, as the sufferer can seem cold and angry, attention seeking, or not wanting help.

Are borderline personalities abusive?

Those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or those with BPD who may not even know they have it, are more likely than the general population to be verbally, emotionally/psychologically, physically abusive.

How do you make someone with BPD feel loved?

In order to foster a strong bond, it's important to know how to love someone with borderline personality disorder in a way that nurtures both of you.
  1. Acknowledge the Realness of BPD. ...
  2. Make Room for Yourself. ...
  3. Stop Rescuing. ...
  4. Encourage High-Quality Treatment. ...
  5. Treatment at Bridges to Recovery.


Are borderlines loyal?

We're loyal partners and friends

Though there's often an assumption that we have unstable relationships – and in fact this is listed as one of the main symptoms of BPD – we are extremely loyal. As mentioned above, we tend to put ourselves last. Relationships are truly important to us, and our loyalty is strong.

Are borderlines clingy?

People with BPD can act overly needy. If you take them out of their comfort zone, or when they feel “abandoned” they can become a burden.

How do you spot a narcissist on a date?

Here are some signs to look out for and tips to handle them.
  1. They were charming at first. ...
  2. They hog the conversation, talking about how great they are. ...
  3. They feed off your compliments. ...
  4. They lack empathy. ...
  5. They don't have any (or many) long-term friends. ...
  6. They pick on you constantly. ...
  7. They gaslight you.


Why am I attracted to narcissistic personalities?

Our Self-Esteem

Unfortunately, we accept the love we think we deserve. On the flip side, you may be attracted to narcissistic partners because of their confidence and charm. They can introduce you to their life of excitement and supposed glamour, making you feel amazing - but only when you're with them.

How long do BPD breakups last?

One study found most women with BPD (68.7%) experienced frequent breakups and reconciliations within their relationships, and over 18 months, almost 30% of them permanently broke up with their significant others. On average, couples broke up about once every 6 ½ months but tended to get back together.