Why do BPD triangulate?

Someone with BPD may use triangulation to receive reassurance and avoid feelings of abandonment. They may do this by manipulating someone else to feel jealous, thereby proving their love and commitment to them.


What causes triangulation?

Triangulation happens when one or both of the people involved in the conflict try to pull a third person into the dynamic, often with the goal of: deflecting some of the tension. creating another conflict to take the spotlight off the original issue. reinforcing their sense of rightness or superiority.

What type of person uses triangulation?

Triangulation is when a toxic or manipulative person, often a person with strong narcissistic traits, brings a third person into their relationship in order to remain in control. There will be limited or no communication between the two triangulated individuals except through the manipulator.


Why do borderlines test boundaries?

Many with BPD unconsciously link feeling cared for, to having their expectations met and to having people intuit their needs. Testing is a way of seeing whether those criteria have been met, and therefore ultimately, it is a way of finding out whether one is cared for.

Do borderlines sabotage?

Borderline personality disorder causes a broad range of reactions that can be considered self-destructive or self-sabotaging. It influences thoughts, emotions, behavior, and communication, adding a degree of volatility and unpredictability to daily living that can be unsettling for BPD sufferers and their loved ones.


Borderline Triangulates with Rescuer to Silence Pain, Abandonment Anxiety



How do borderlines destroy lives?

BPD splitting destroys relationships because the behaviour can be impulsive or reckless in order to alleviate the pain, often hurting loved ones in the process. It can feel like everyone abandons or hurts them, often causing them to look for evidence, and creating problems from nothing.

Why do borderlines push you away?

If someone has a borderline personality, they will always push people away, in fear of getting hurt. This is extremely difficult and painful for the people around them, as the sufferer can seem cold and angry, attention seeking, or not wanting help.

Do borderlines know when they are splitting?

Care and Management of BPD Splitting

Remember that splitting is a symptom of borderline personality disorder - while it can be difficult not to take their words and actions personally, remember that the person is not intentionally trying to hurt you. Splitting is something that they are doing unknowingly.


Do borderlines choose their favorite person?

MD. People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) often rotate between idolizing and devaluing others. In the case of the “favorite person,” the individual with BPD prefers one person and wants to spend all their time with them.

Do borderlines use Gaslighting?

Gaslighting is by no means unique to individuals with borderline personality disorder (BPD), but certain symptoms make it more likely for people with BPD to feel gaslighted by others and create circumstances where others feel gaslighted by them. Gaps in memory result from dissociation.

What are the 4 types of triangulation?

Among experts in triangulation in the social sciences, there contin- ues to be a general consensus on the usefulness of the four types of triangulation originally identified by Denzin in the 1970s: (1) data triangulation; (2) investigator triangulation; (3) theory triangulation; and (4) methodological or method ...


Who is most associated with triangulation?

Triangulation is a term in psychology most closely associated with the work of Murray Bowen known as family therapy. Bowen theorized that a two-person emotional system is unstable, in that under stress it forms itself into a three-person system or triangle.

What are three forms of triangulation?

Types of triangulation in research
  • Data triangulation: Using data from different times, spaces, and people.
  • Investigator triangulation: Involving multiple researchers in collecting or analyzing data.
  • Theory triangulation: Using varying theoretical perspectives in your research.


How do you deal with being triangulated?

Coping With Triangulation
  1. Don't respond quickly to surprising news.
  2. Take a step back and consider the facts.
  3. Try your best not to lose your temper or lose control of your feelings. ...
  4. Don't make promises, commitments, or contracts that'll only hurt your relationship with people whom you trust and love.


How do you disengage triangulation?

You might have been uncomfortable finding yourself in the middle of their conflict.
...
How to Disengage from a Triangle
  1. Recognize a triangle when you see one. ...
  2. Keep things clean; maintain good boundaries. ...
  3. Talk openly with family members about triangulation.


What happens during triangulation?

Triangulation is a type of survey which starts at a baseline joining two positions with a known distance and grows by adding sides to form a triangle, measuring the angles formed – always exceeding 20° – and shaping a network of connected triangles whose sides have 'calculated' distances.

Who is the borderline attracted to?

Those who have BPD tend to be very intense, dramatic, and exciting. This means they tend to attract others who are depressed and/or suffering low self-esteem. People who take their power from being a victim, or seek excitement in others because their own life is not where they want it to be.


How do you make someone with BPD feel loved?

In order to foster a strong bond, it's important to know how to love someone with borderline personality disorder in a way that nurtures both of you.
  1. Acknowledge the Realness of BPD. ...
  2. Make Room for Yourself. ...
  3. Stop Rescuing. ...
  4. Encourage High-Quality Treatment. ...
  5. Treatment at Bridges to Recovery.


How do people with BPD show affection?

Affection – People with BPD are either extremely affectionate or withdrawn, which may be confusing for those who don't have the disorder. Abandonment – Lots of people are scared that their partner isn't happy; but when you have BPD, you may be in constant worry that they will leave.

What triggers splitting in BPD?

What might trigger a splitting episode? A split is typically triggered by an event that causes a person with BPD to take extreme emotional viewpoints. These events may be relatively ordinary, such as having to travel on a business trip or getting in an argument with someone.


Do borderlines feel remorse?

Only remorse leads to a real apology and change. One of the hallmarks of people with Borderline Personality Disorder or Narcissistic Personality Disorder (BP/NP) is that they often do not feel truly sorry. Even though a BP/NP may say he or she is sorry, there is often something lacking.

Do borderlines isolate themselves?

A 2019 study found that those with BPD were at higher risk of self-isolation than those with other personality disorders. Emptiness is also a common symptom of BPD — and a common cause of loneliness.

Do people with BPD push away people they love?

As a result, the fear of being abandoned often causes people with BPD to form unhealthy attachments, sometimes abruptly cutting off, as well as making frantic attempts to hold onto relationships. These overly intense or erratic behaviors, in turn, often push loved ones away.


When should you leave a borderline?

When You Should Break Up With Your BPD Partner
  1. Physical Violence. Any form of physical violence is toxic in a relationship. ...
  2. Emotional or Verbal Abuse. Verbal and emotional abuse may not leave physical marks, but it can be just as damaging as physical abuse in relationships. ...
  3. Controlling Behavior. ...
  4. Manipulation. ...
  5. Competition.


How do you respond to a borderline outburst?

How to Help
  1. Be patient.
  2. Be realistic.
  3. Try to separate facts from feelings.
  4. Validate feelings first.
  5. Listen actively and be sympathetic.
  6. Seek to distract when emotions rise.
  7. Do not allow yourself to be the product of the intense anger; attempt to diffuse it but sometimes you may have to walk away.